Easy Crafts for the Insane

 Easy Crafts for the Insane: The Mostly Funny Memoir of Mental Illness and Making Things by Kelly Williams Brown
2021
Weight: 1.6 lbs
Method of Disposal: Giving Away on with a Buy Nothing Group

This book left me with an uneasy feeling for days and was, ultimately, "the straw that broke the camel's back" for me.  I have been battling depression unsuccessfully for quite some time now.  I do not want to ruin the book for you if you have not read it.  So, stop reading here now if you want--how odd to think about "ruining the story" when you are talking about someone's life.

In this book, the author talks about her own struggle with depression and the impacts it had on her relationships with her friends, self, boyfriend, and family.  She also describes her near death experience with suicide.  The way she described it haunted me in that she did not think of herself as someone who would die that way and then found herself just minutes away from death.  Her boyfriend could not recover from it and was deeply wounded.  They ultimately broke up.  I did not think I would go that far either, but there were many times I scared myself with how deeply I was sinking anyway.  Especially right before, during, and after my period.  I could not live like that--feeling like I could not control my own actions for half the month each month.  The author wrote about her brain being unhealthy in the same way other parts of her body could become unhealthy.  She would not think twice about taking medication to help other parts of her body.  She described how it felt after she took medication for her mental health.  

I wanted to be a better wife and partner.  I started looking into psychiatrists and finally decided to talk to one and started to take Prozac.  It was not easy.  Over a decade ago, I had a negative experience with a psychiatrist and therapist that left me unwilling to seek help for my mental health since.   I got desperate enough.  That is where I am at.  The edge has been taken off, and I am trying to figure it all out with a little less drama.  I am grateful to the author for the insight.

All My Puny Sorrows

 All My Puny Sorrows by Miriam Toews

2019

Weight: 12 oz

Method of Disposal: Donating

I had heard amazing things about this book, and I understand why.  I found it to be challenging and difficult, like dealing with mental illness is.  It was not unskilled, and the author had clearly put her heart into it.  It is a book about a sister who spends her life trying to stop her own successful sister's death by suicide.  It was heavy, dark, and frustrating.  I cannot say I enjoyed it as much as others did, but I see the value in it.  

I am glad there was no reason given for the sister's desire to die, though I see that many reviewers craved that.  But, that is the problem with mental illness, isn't it?  There is not always a reason or a clear reason other than it is something that resides inside a person and takes over their life.  It IS frustrating.  There is no easy fix.  If there was, so many people could be saved and this book would not likely exist.

How to Live With a Neurotic Dog

 How to Live With a Neurotic Dog by Stephen Baker
1994
Weight: 16 oz
Method of Disposal: Lending Library               

                                                                                      

I spend an overwhelming amount of time with neurotic dogs, and I adopted the most neurotic dog I ever met.  I have met thousands of dogs during the most stressful times of their lives so that is no small statement.  The dog I adopted is on Prozac, Gabapentin, and Trazadone for his anxieties.  It is not surprising that someone saw this book and thought of me.  I enjoyed the simple jokes and light heartedness of it--much of my work with pets is far too heavy--but the pictures were the best part for sure.  

Find Me

 Find Me by Rosie O'Donnell
2002
Weight: 12 oz
Method of Disposal: Lending Library

I do not know what I was expecting when I picked up this book, but it was not this.  Not even a little.  Generally, with famous folks writing books, you get a memoir, but not always.  I guess, in some ways, this was part memoir, though mostly focused on one part of one year of Rosie's life where she gets overly involved with a pregnant child and rape survivor who ends up not being that at all.  I feel like you get a real insight into Rosie's mind, at least in that year, and she tries to let you see the good, bad, and the ugly.  She seems like she is being vulnerable.

I am healing from surgery and am about to go to work, light duty.  I have been working from home, on pain medication, feeling overwhelmed, depressed, and mentally unsound myself.  I have been reading book after book, when I can squeeze them in, and I feel like I have been existing on some third dimension where there is no safety net, and you just keep falling.  All of this is, who am I to make commentary on anyone's mental state or book right now?  I am just glad to have so many books from so many years to read when I cannot be in my own mind anymore.

The Stranger in the Woods

 The Stranger in the Woods:  The Extraordinary Story of the Last True Hermit by Michael Finkel
2017
Weight:15 oz
Method of Disposal: Giving Away

This is a hard one.  The story itself is very interesting, a young man goes off into the woods to survive by way of minor theft, staying hidden, and building a rudimentary encampment in Maine.  He spoke one word to one hiker in 25 years and survived some brutal winters.  He claims he did this without even lighting a fire.  Some people consider him a simple thief, others a convicted felon who made them feel unsafe for years, and others think of him as a wise man who has done the unthinkable and potentially knows some great truths that the rest of us may struggle to obtain or may never obtain.

I am of the train of thought that he is not just a simple thief or felon, and that there is no reason to resent him for being "lazy," as many have, and also that he is not a magical, wise man with all sorts of insight. I do feel for the families that lived in fear and were scared someone would break in with their children in the home, though I do agree with those who think prison time and a life sentence would make no sense in this case. To me, he is just a man with mental health concerns that are unlike most of the population and, because of how his mind works and who he is, he managed to do something extraordinary that many of us could not even begin to conceive of doing.

As for the author, I struggle.  I am excited with him when Mr. Knight (the "hermit") writes him back after he sends him a letter, but things get uncomfortable towards the end when Mr. Knight and his family plead with the author to leave him alone.  On the one hand, I do think he found a special connection with Mr. Knight and that there was something about him that Mr. Knight was somewhat drawn to and, on the other hand, CONSENT.  It is hard though.  Things are not black and white when Mr. Knight says that he will likely kill himself and asks the author to turn away and leave him to it.  Mr. Knight also tells him, at one point, to write whatever he wants and that he is not concerned about it at all.

Some people really think the author is exploiting Mr. Knight, and I really believe the author is genuinely enthralled with him and cares about him.  I think this book was likely a labor of love and enchantment but, when a man tells you to leave him alone enough, you do need to leave him alone, of course, which he ultimately does.  So, I clearly do not know anything and have no answers, but there is no way around the fact that this is a unique and interesting story.