Carry On: Reflections for a New Generation

 Carry On: Reflections for a New Generation by John Lewis

2021

Weight: 11.3 oz

Method of Disposal: Giving to a Friend

This book includes some basic, quick reflections on the things that are most important in a life.  John Lewis speaks his most surface level thoughts on marriage, fear, mentors, hope, the future, Covid-19, same-sex marriage, immigration, art, activism, heroes, and so on.  It is a book of reflections.  If you know much about John Lewis, none of this will feel particularly new or insightful, but it is a nice memory of him and his life.  There is no doubt, and it has been expressed by so many people, that we lost a great man in 2020.  This book is an easy read and might be a good introduction for young students.

Women and Aids

 Women and Aids by Jane Richardson
1988
Weight: 7 ounces
Method of Disposal: Donating

This book is extremely dated at this point, but it was interesting to read for so many reasons.  Living through the start of AIDS and the start of COVID would have been wildly different for so many reasons, but, having lived as an adult during the time of a pandemic, there are certain things I feel like I was more attuned to or attentive to now.  Not just the fear and the unknown, but the attempt and the struggle to manage people's reactions and to preserve a sense of humanity.  The constant reassurance that we can all still care for each other and that our fear should not make us react with hatred.  It should not make us ostracize sick people.  

Another thing I found interesting was reading this and knowing the strides we have made sense AIDS blew up on the scene in the 80's.  I could fill in some of the missing gaps in information and answer some questions.  Some things I had to Google, and I learned that way.  In other areas, I was sad to know that there were still so many things happening then that are still happening now.  The author was seemingly a compassionate person who recognized homophobia, racism, ethnocentrism, when possible, and that was much appreciated.

All in all, this was a quality book.  It was clearly more useful when it was written than it is now, but it is an excellent layout for how to write a sensitive, helpful guide on a virus that people do not know much about.

Confessions of a Failed Southern Lady

 Confessions of a Failed Southern Lady by Florence King
1990
Weight: 12 oz
Method of Disposal: Donating

This book.  The reviews crack me up because so many people are hung up on the descriptions of lesbian sex, the fact that she sleeps with and uses men, the vulgarity of her language.  It is telling to me that these are the things that really disturb people.  I give props to this person who said the lesbian sex was repulsive to her and yet she gave the book 5 stars.  Kudos to her for sticking with something outside her comfort zone and still finding the beauty!

I, for one, loved to listen to her talk about sex, sexuality, and gender roles!

What shocks me is that no one seems to be talking about how she writes about race and racism in the book.  It seems to me that she is very much of the mindset that the South is the South and you just have to work with it.  You are a friend of black people if you work within the system to help 1 or 2 of them you know personally, but you would never try to dismantle that system, or actually get to know any of them in any real way.  She talks about racism from the edge of it, just taking a peek inside, and then running away from it full force.  It did not impact her life so much as it was happening around her.  It just totally took me out of the book.  

I know that literature can be mired in the timeframe it was written, but that does not make me love it anymore.  I just kept thinking about how it made me feel and then wondering how it might make others feel.  It just was not great.

How To Talk to a Liberal (If You Must)

 How To Talk to a Liberal (If You Must): The World According to Ann Coulter
2004
Weight: 1.4 lbs
Method of Disposal: Recycling

Every now and then I feel like I should read something abhorrent just to see what people who are nothing like me are reading and taking in.  I do not know why I would have chosen Ann Coulter of all authors, but the Laura of 2004 had her reasons, I am sure. 

Let's see if I can highlight some of the golden tidbits so that you can spare yourself.

"Want to make liberals angry? Defend the United States."

"My position hasn't changed since the column I wrote the night of 09/11.  For reasons I cannot understand, I am often asked if I still think we should invade their countries, kill their leaders, and convert them to Christianity.  The answer is: Now more than ever!"

"The invasion of Iraq has gone fabulously well, exceeding everyone's expectations--certainly exceeding the doomsday scenarios of liberals."

The title of chapter 3 is "A Muslim by Any Other Name Blows Up Just the Same."

"I tuned in late and consequently can speak only to the last three hours of Halle Berry's acceptance speech at the Academy Awards last Sunday. But inasmuch as she engaged in wild race-baiting to get her Oscar, Berry's expressions of shock were not very believable.  She has spent weeks complaining about one time she did not get a role because of her color.  It was the part of a forest ranger.  Arnold Scwarzenegger probably has trouble getting roles as a ballet dancer, too.  And yet, still, somehow white guilt worked on Hollywood liberals!  Berry had successfully mau-maued her way to a Best Actress award--and then acted surprised.

It's interesting that Berry makes such a big deal about being black.  She was raised by her white mother who was beaten by her black father.  But clearly, Berry has calculated that it is more advantageous for her acting career to identify with the man that abandoned her rather than the woman who raised her."  

In case, at this point, you are wondering.  Ann Coulter is a racist and also a shitty human being.  I could keep going, but I am not sure it is worth the extra pain and toxicity it would add to the interwebs.

Tomorrow is Inauguration Day.  Let's just hope no one dies.  There are some seriously angry, unhinged, and brainwashed people out there right now.  Ann Coulter would not think it possible, but I hope we are able to preserve the beautiful things about the United States, protect our democracy, and make the world a safer/kinder place.

Caste

 Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents by Isabel Wilkerson
2020
Weight: 1. 7 lbs
Method of Disposal: Mailing to my Mom

I am grateful this heavy, painful, difficult, and powerful book was passed on to me by a friend.  Books like these,  I always think that I want everyone to read them, but then I think, do I?  I want those with the appropriate mental strength and fortitude to read them.  But who should be excused if they do not have that?  Who should read it?  Will this book find the people that will get the most from it?  Or is it more about doing the most with it?  I could see that for some it would be so painful to live treated as a bottom caste member, surrounded by others in the dominant caste, and then to pick up a book like this and read horror upon horror.  I briefly read some of the reviews of this book on Amazon, written by people who seem to be the people I most think would benefit from reading this book, people I want to read it the most, and I am horrified by how quickly they dismiss this book as liberal trash.  Did they really read it?  All the way through?  Or is it best to focus on the MUCH larger number of people who rated it 5 stars?

Here are some snippets from this book that I hope are enough to make you want to read more.  I am still processing and, really, I would rather you read Isabel Wilkerson than read my words trying to express hers anyway.

"None of us chose the circumstances of our birth.  We had nothing to do with having been born into privilege or under stigma.  We have everything to do with what we do with our God-given talents and how we treat others in our species from this day forward.  

We are not personally responsible for what people who look like us did centuries ago.  But we are responsible for what good or ill we do to people alive with us today.  We are each of us responsible for every decision we make that hurts or harms another human being."

I guess the above is not so surprising, but I believe I pulled it out because I am so tired of hearing that argument from white people.  I was not there.  I did not own slaves.  I have no responsibility.  Just stop trying to defend yourself and start trying to be the best person you can possibly be.  We all owe that to each other.

"The fact is that the bottom caste, though it bears much of the burden of the hierarchy, did not create the caste system, and the bottom caste alone cannot fix it.  The challenge had long been that many in the dominant caste, who are in a better position to fix caste inquality, have often been the least likely to want to.

Caste is a disease, and none of us is immune.  It is as if alcoholism is encoded in the country's DNA, and can never be declared fully cured.  It is like a cancer that goes into remission only to return when the immune system of the body politic is weakened.

Thus, regardless of who prevails in any given election, the country still labors under the divisions that a caste system creates, and the fears and resentments of the dominant caste that is too often in opposition to the yearnings of those deemed beneath them."

I think what speaks to me here is that there was Obama and then there was Trump, and it is is easy to want to shout WHAT? HOW? WHO LET THIS HAPPEN?  It is more difficult to know in your heart that Trump did not just happen and is not an anomaly.  That one man or administration is not THE problem.  None of us, no matter our caste, can ignore the caste system.  It is sickening our individual mental and physical health, it is sickening our communities, it is sickening our nations.

"Germany bears witness to an uncomfortable truth--that evil is not one person but can be easily activated in more people than we would like to believe when the right conditions congeal.  It is easy to say, If we could just root out the despots before they took power or intercept their rise.  If we could just wait until the bigots die away...It is much harder to look into the darkness in the hearts of ordinary people with unquiet minds, needing someone to feel better than, whose cheers and votes allow despots anywhere in the world to rise to power in the first place.  It is harder to focus on the danger of the common will, the weaknesses of the human immune system, the ease with which toxins can infect succeeding generations.  Because it means the enemy, the threat, is not one man, it is us, all of us, lurking in humanity itself."

There is so much that I want to pull out and share, like the above quote, but you should just read the book because these beautiful, thoughtful snippets do not have the same power when they stand alone as they do when they are encapsulated with the author's personal experiences, stories from other individuals, people you read about in the news.  Just remember, if it starts to feel like it is too much or that it is overwhelming it is because what you are reading about is too much and is overwhelming.  We cannot fix what we refuse to see and recognize.  If it feels too painful that is because it is too painful, and it has been for a long time.  Ignoring the pain not only does not make it go away, but it makes more pain. If comparing slavery to Nazi Germany rubs you the wrong way, can you at least ask yourself why? Can you, at least, keep reading?  I do not want to be wiping the ash of human beings off a child's jacket and pretending not to see the cruelty around me.  I do not want to hold the burden of having been that person in my lifetime and beyond.  I do not want to be the ash on that child's jacket.  I do not want to miss out on all the great things humanity can achieve if we all take care of each other and allow each other to live and thrive.  

Read this book.  Tell me what you think.  Let's start there.

Dear Martin

Dear Martin by Nic Stone
2018
Weight: 6. 4 oz
Method of Disposal: Leaving in Lending Library

Harriet bought me Dear Martin as a surprise, and I am glad she did.  It is a young adult book about racism, being a teenager, being a black teenager among white teenagers, and police shootings.  It is important that we have books like these for young adults.  Young people are seeing young black men being killed by police in the news.  Black teenagers are in between being kids and adults, but they are so often seen as adults by authority figures and not just adults, but also as a threat just by being in a random place (their home/the sidewalk/the train station/the car/etc) at the wrong time (a time where someone with power is feeling scared or angry). 

Today, I watched "When They See Us."  I think I have written about the Central Park Five here before.  It is a story that never gets less heartbreaking and, honestly, just gets worse the more you know.  The people who made this series did a great job.  For any white people who cannot see black teenagers as children, you should watch this and do not look away.  I do not even have children but, if you do, can we please all just open our hearts to what it would feel like to be the parents of these boys?  For everyone else, the siblings, friends, girlfriends.  Whiteness has been constructed.  There is no going back.  We can only go forward. We do not want to keep ruining lives and embracing an embarrassing and incredibly cruel history or acting like it did not happen.  That helps no one.  We have got to do the hard work.

Black Ice

Black Ice by Lorene Cary
2010
Weight: 1 lb
Method of Disposal: Lending Library

I have no idea where I got this book.  Another lending library?  I am glad I grabbed it from wherever I did.  It is an autobiography about a woman I knew nothing about before reading it, but I cared about her right away.  She is a bright and motivated young girl that grew up in Philadelphia and went to an elite school in New Hampshire in the 70's.  The school was predominantly white, but it had begun accepting black students before she attended.  She got there and was tokenized but also taught and encouraged.  She found close friends and attempted to find herself.  Ultimately, she would become a teacher at that same school.  She clearly has conflicting emotions and feelings about her time there, understandably.  A teenager would anyway, but with being transplanted from one city and experience to another city and experience, while feeling the pressure to perform above average as a black teenage girl on a scholarship, it would have been overwhelming.  Lorene strives and succeeds and then she allows us into her private thoughts during that time.  It is great all around.























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A Colony in a Nation

A Colony in a Nation by Chris Hayes
2018
Weight: 8 oz
Method of Disposal: Lending Library

This book was accessible and could likely be read and understood by a variety of people.  The author is willing to turn the camera on himself at times to examine his own privilege, but he does not focus in on himself to the extent that it becomes superficial and nauseating.  He ties in his experiences growing up in New York in the 80's, his reporting from Ferguson after the shooting of Michael Brown, American colonialism, and information and insight about race relations in America spanning at least 3 decades.

He posits that there are two Americas that exist at the same time--one America experienced by "The Nation" and one America experienced by "The Colony."

He writes, "If you live in the Nation, the criminal justice system functions like your laptop’s operating system, quietly humming in the background, doing what it needs to do to allow you to be your most efficient, functional self. In the Colony, the system functions like a computer virus: it intrudes constantly, interrupts your life at the most inconvenient times, and it does this as a matter of course. The disruption itself is normal.

In the Nation, there is law; in the Colony, there is only a concern with order. In the Nation, you have rights;in the Colony, you have commands.  In the Nation, you are innocent until proven guilty; in the Colony, you are born guilty" (pp. 37 and 38)

Later, he writes, " So what would it mean if the Nation and the Colony were joined, if the borders erased, and the humanity--the full, outrageous, maddening humanity--of every single human citizen were recognized and embodied in our society? Or even just to start, our policing?

I want to think it would be nothing but a net benefit for us all.  For so long one of the great tools of white supremacy has been telling white people that there's a fixed pie, and whatever black people get, they lose.  As a matter of first principles, I reject that" (p.213).

He brings up the Brock Turner case from Stanford University and how the rapist was given a small sentence due to his background and potential.  He discusses our instinct to "level down" rather than to"level up."  We want Brock Turner to be treated like those in the Colony.  We want revenge.  Instead of wanting those in the Colony to be treated as well as Brock Turner was.  He was right for me in that the name Brock Turner fills me with such rage, and I would love to see the wealthy, white, sociopath suffer in jail for far longer than 6 months.  I understand Hayes point though.  Getting revenge on Turner will not change anything in our criminal justice system with its systematic racism and tough on crime mentality.  

Overall, the book was thought-provoking and told in a way that I hope many people will be able to hear.  I would recommend it to others, especially others who have not read many or any books on race relations in America or on racism within our justice system.

Rosa Lee

Rosa Lee: A Mother and Her Family in Urban America by Leon Dash
1996
Weight: 8.8 oz
Method of Disposal: Give back to mom or lending library

This book was brutal.  It was a window into a world I can clearly see I have no known experience with, and it was hard to face.  The very idea that a mother would feel like she had to sell her own child and that she felt the child had been able to consent in any way is truly shocking to me and what is more shocking is that you cannot just villainize that mother and neatly put her away in a box labeled "terrible."  There is so much more to Rosa's story--good and bad. Rosa Lee's family is so influenced by institutionalized racism that is impossible to even imagine what would have happened to them in a different society or place.

I understand the fear that some people have that this book makes black people look bad, but I definitely disagree.  It is very clear that it does not represent all black people or all poor black people and, if you were ignorant enough to think it truly did, the author clearly writes that it is a thorough case study on just one family and explains why he thinks it is important.  Still, I know that there are many people who would read this story as evidence for whatever they already believe and that is always scary. 

The author writes, "I recognize that there are many ways to look at Rosa Lee.  There is something of her life to confirm any political viewpoint--liberal, moderate, or conservative.  Some may see her as a victim of hopeless circumstances, a woman born to a life of deprivation because of America's long history of discrimination and racism.  Others may give her the benefit of the doubt in some cases but hold her personally accountable for much of what she did to herself, her children, and her grandchildren.  A third group might say that Rosa Lee is a thief, a drug addict, a failed parent, a broken woman paying for her sins, and a woman who seemingly was so set on placing her children on the path to failure that it is amazing that even two of them manage to live conventional lives" (p. 251).

No matter how the reader feels about whether it should have been written or not, there is one thing we should all be able to agree on.  It is heartbreaking from beginning to end.  The destruction the drugs wreaked on this family and this community is unbelievable and frightening.  The individual understanding, accountability, and expectations each hiv-infected person had about their illness, their future, and the future of others around them was eye-opening. 

I could not help but think about myself now aged 32 and Patty Cunningham, Rosa Lee's daughter, being in her thirties in the book and completely addicted to heroine.  Unable to get through a single day without the drug, despite the danger she was in, without jail time.  The sexual abuse she suffered again and again.  We know what happens to Bobby and to Rosa.  I don't know if I want to know, but I cannot help but wonder what happens to Patty and Junior.  I also wonder about the others, of course, about Alvin, Eric, Ducky,Richard, Ronnie, hell, even Mr. Dash.  This appears to be Patty: http://www.tributes.com/obituary/show/Donna-D.-Wright-86154465.  What did she do until 2009?  I suppose it is none of my business, but I am grateful to the author for taking the time and for Rosa and participating family members for sharing their secrets and their lives.

The Fire This Time

The Fire This Time: A New Generation Speaks about Race by Jesmyn Ward
2017
Weight: 7.2 oz
Method of Disposal: Giving to Tracy

This collection was recommended to me by my friend Liz, and I am glad she encouraged me to buy it.  It is a collection of essays and poetry about the Black American experience.  Some of the writing is much better than others, but I imagine each piece speaks to different people.  I found this to be a great step up in finding other interesting authors and books.  I went on a book buying spree looking for Wendy S. Walters, Jesmyn Ward, and Garnette Cadogan.  Thinking about Garnette walking the streets of Kingston, New Orleans, and New York was a huge open window for me.  I felt like I was able to peer into the life of a young, black man and truly understand that I cannot truly understand what it feels like for all eyes to be on me, wondering what I am up to, where I am going, whether I am guilty of something.  And not just eyes, often hands, feet, fists.  How awful to live with that weight and constant looking over your shoulder. 

The same happened with Wendy's loneliness.  I felt it deep within me even though I recognized that I have never felt it and will never be able to without living every. single. day. with it.  I suggest you take the time to read this book or, if you are short on time, at least  check out some of the writing inside.  I would start with those 4 authors if you aren't going to read it all.

The Autobiography of an Execution

The Autobiography of an Execution by David R. Dow
2010
Weight: 1.2 lbs
Method of Disposal: Gave away to brunch buddy...

I admit that I bought The Autobiography of an Execution at a discount bookstore about a week ago.  I glanced over and thought is might be worth a look, but it had no price tag so I was going to walk away.  My wife asked how much it would cost and was told $6.50.  I decided to buy it and was charged $4.50.  That was an incredibly good use of $4.50.

I was smitten with this book.  I felt like I could strangely empathize with the author, despite the fact that my life and career in no way compares to his, and was completely caught up in his point of view.  I was drawn into the stories of the death row prisoners he described and, while my heart was breaking into a million pieces, I was developing incredible amounts of respect for the death row defense lawyers.  I finished the book around 4:30 am the second night of reading it, and I was absolutely bawling beside my peacefully sleeping partner.  

I highly recommend it.  

And I hope many many more people read it and realize we need to seriously make some changes in our criminal justice system. 

Do Not Deny Me

Do Not Deny Me: Stories Jean Thompson
2009
Weight:9.6 oz
Method of Disposal: Left on Bainbridge Island in front of the grocery store

I want to write this whole blog about how amazing Do Not Deny me is, because it is so very amazing.  The first story brings you in strong and the last story ends strong.  You are not flipping any pages trying to see when it will end.  I am in love with the way she presents American dysfunction, and I cannot wait to get my hands on her book, Throw Like a Girl.

Unfortunately, that is all I can say on that right now.  I am far more focused on the fact that two black men were shot dead in the United States in the past two days.  Philando Castile and Alton Sterling.  Two more names to add to an incredibly long list of black people killed in this country unjustly.  Two more human beings with family, friends, loved ones who are most likely mourning, scared, and confused right now.  How do you make sense of a death like that?  Some of us can turn it into a cause or movement, some of us will be debilitated from it for some time, and some people cannot risk doing either of those things.  Some people have lost the people they love and they should not have to fight this fight.   We need to stand behind them, support them, affirm that black lives matter.  Don't be quiet in your discomfort.  This has got to change.  

Diary of a Blue-Eyed Devil

Autobiography of a Blue-Eyed Devil: My Life and Times in a Racist, Imperialist Society

Inga Muscio

2005

Weight: 1 lb

Method of Disposal: Putting in a Better World Books Bin

I have finally finished the last Inga Muscio book I own.  After Cunt impressed me so much when I was around 16, I kept feeling like I needed to read her other work and kept collecting them as they came out, even though I had come to the realization that Cunt was much less mind blowing than I thought and a little more offensive.  If you have read my past blog, you know I was not enthralled with Rose.  I decided to read this one on the heels of that one so I could go ahead and just get rid of them.  It took me all month.

I will say that this one was much much better than Rose and even had snippets where I could get into her voice and what she was saying all over again.  I believe it is important for Americans to face the rampant racism and imperialism of our country.  I appreciate that she put so many provocative truths forward, but she continued to let me down.  For someone who thinks so much about discrimination, reclaiming and the power of words, and various isms she really seems to be lacking an understanding or a willingness to understand (dis)ability.  How are we still using “retard” three books in?  How is it that this book is the first one I remember seeing ability looked at in its own right, and each time it was brought up it was in a superficial or blase way, if not thrown out as an insult.  It would be so easy to fix!  

I am sure no one will be shocked, given that I work at an animal shelter in the South and see cruelty/neglect on a daily basis, that I was not all that thrilled with her tangent about companion animals and spay/neuter.  That is not to say that I think animals exist to be our pets and that I do not, also, have a problem with how we breed, abuse, dominate, and mistreat them.  I do not think, in an ideal world, we would have so many animals in homes and contained.  I do not think that if breeding were controlled and animals were treated with true humaness that we would have to spay/neuter them.  I can understand and empathize with the resistance to spay/neuter, but the benefits to the animals far outweigh the negative.  I think of the thousands of pit bulls on chains, euthanized, abused every day and cringe at the thought of making more that will suffer the same way their peers did.  I would rather spay one pit bull than watch their offspring starve to death, live in crowded shelter conditions waiting for death, get hit by cars, so on and so forth.  And this goes for all pets, but I use pit bulls because I love them so and they are the least adopted, most mistreated companion animal of all time.  Also, Inga Muscio has a friend who use to have to sleep with a gun and a PIT BULL every night because of living amongst gangs.

I like how she describes her love for America, as well as her dislike.  I appreciate that she took the time to lead the reader to see the beauty of this racist, imperialist country even while exposing gross injustice.

I do not like the stories about her blowing up on random strangers, like the woman on the plane who asked her what she was eating.   Inga is sure it was because the woman was white and the food did not fit into her worldview of normal.  I am not so sure.  Sometimes, I question her reason and her anger management.  A woman asking about some noodles got blown way out of proportion.  And, even if that was what was going on, couldn’t you find a better example of everyday racism?  Or educate the woman instead of confuse her? This book was way too long and contained way to many disconnected snippets.  I read the first 200 pages quickly and suffered through the redundancy and negativity of the last 300.

She has a good idea.  She says important things.  But it is always face value, and intentionally over-the-top-shock-value material.  She never achieves a tangible, well thought out, connected piece of work.  This is the last Inga book I will read, no matter how many more she writes.  I am sorry about that.  We have so much in common and so many interesting/useful differences, but I am done.  It has become overwhelming and reading is supposed to be fun/educational/helpful/inspirational/enraging/meaningful/something else.  I mean, I am supposed to feel something other than irritation, I think.

Side note:  I do not quite understand the idea of her choosing not to swim in the ocean, which she loves so much, because the ocean is so mistreated.  It talked to her and told her.  People do massive damage to the ocean and the planet, and we should be angry, but really, what does not swimming in the ocean do to help the situation really?  You will have to read the section for yourself.

Sing Down the Moon

Sing Down the Moon 1992

Island of the Blue Dolphins 1987

Scott O’Dell

Weight: 7 oz

Method of Disposal: Recycling

These two O’Dell books were popular amongst my peers growing up.  I really do not remember how I felt about them as a child.  I had to re-read them last month because I could not remember what they were about, and I know a lot of the magic was lost.  I was not sure how to read it as an adult.  I was pleased and excited that the lead characters were both strong-willed and courageous girls.  It was a comforting juxtaposition to the likes of the Twilight series, where the lead girl is not independent or intelligent.  I was glad to think that children were being introduced to Native American (for lack of better words) experiences, but equally concerned that they were being written by a non-native writer.   The misinformation is spread early.  I am glad O’Dell wrote about people in a positive and affirming manner, but it is disappointing that I did not grow up reading any award winning Native American authors.  Kids should learn about The Trail of Tears and the destruction of life and land carried (being carried) out by white people.  It is important, despite their youth, so that they can begin to see the world as it is and imagine it as it hopefully will be when they help reshape it.

In the spirit of America, the O’Dell books were offered up in our public schools, while we were also being embedded with racism.  We sat in a circle singing “I’m an Indian Chief in my wigwam high, see my tom toms beat, hear my arrow fly.  I ride my pony every day.  I ride it fast and far away.  I-yi-yi-yi-yi, I yi-yi-yi-yi, How.”  I still remember it!  What is that?!  We learned it because we had a “real Indian” visiting our classroom!  I went to Braves games and held my tom tom proudly in the air.  I stomped all over Rock Eagle without thinking a thing about it.  There was one group, Native Americans, not many tribes and many people.  My mother had me read Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee, which was great, but I was getting mixed messages and not learning a whole lot.  Does this begin to, kind of, explain my discomfort when re-reading O’Dell’s books?  What was I willingly ingesting?

On a side note, I am not sure if children should or should not be allowed to write reviews about books online.  They are horrible, sometimes wonderful, and almost always amusing.  A lot of kids liked O’Dell, but the image above shows some of the comments from those who did not.  Enjoy!

Leaving Atlanta

Leaving Atlanta  by Tayari Jones

2002

Weight: 1 lb

Method of Disposal: Donating or giving to you if you ask for it.

I bought this book around 8 years ago, not knowing anything about it, and I promptly forgot about it.  I put it on a wishlist, not knowing anything about it, about a year ago.  I was going to check it out of the library this week, but I noticed it on my bookshelf just yesterday.  I had no idea I owned it, and I still had no idea what it was about when I started reading it before bed last night.

My mother called me when I was about twenty pages from the end of the book.  I was barely able to stop reading it while I was at work.  I was worried about the children.  My concerns and anxiety were rooted deep within me.  I wanted to protect them, but I felt helpless to do so.  There was a mother in me I never knew was there, as I do not want children.  I off-handedly told my mother that I was reading a horrible fictional account of child murders.  I told her it was a good book, but that I had no idea what I was getting into when I picked it up.  I did not want to see all of these children disappear and die.  I mentioned that I had only wanted to get it, in the first place, because I was looking for some modern fiction set in Atlanta.  She asked me if it was based on what happened with Wayne Williams in the early 80s and, I am embarrassed to admit, I had no idea what she was talking about.  I would have known when I read the author’s note at the end of the book, but it hit me hard.  I had been fictionalizing all of it, distancing myself in that way, and then I could no longer do that.  Do not misunderstand, this IS a fictional novel, but it is based on reality.  The author was a child in Atlanta during the time that this book was based on.

In real life, at least 28 black children, teenagers, and adults were murdered between 1979-1981.  There were others that were not officially included in the count, but potentially were killed by the same person.  Williams was arrested and charged with the murder of two adult men, and it was widely believed that he had also been responsible for the children’s murders.  There are, as Jones states, many people who do not believe it was Williams and think the murderer is still at large.  The most recent news story I saw on google was about veterinary forensics involving dog hair that also seems to link Williams to the crimes, but it can also be considered inconclusive.  The controversy continues, but that is not what I am writing about today.

I am writing about this book.  It was told from three different children’s points of view.  I felt so much for all of them.  The author invokes deep emotions and does not shy away from the brutal truths about class and race relations in her book.  I do recommend this novel, though it is difficult to get through.  If you want it.  I will give it to you.  Now that I know, I will never forget.  I cannot imagine the fear, the horror, and the pain Atlanta went through during this time and in the years that have followed.   So many broken families.  My heart goes out to them.  It is appalling that over 20 people were killed, mostly children, and that it took two years to even have someone to blame, no one was convicted.