Confessions of a Failed Southern Lady

 Confessions of a Failed Southern Lady by Florence King
1990
Weight: 12 oz
Method of Disposal: Donating

This book.  The reviews crack me up because so many people are hung up on the descriptions of lesbian sex, the fact that she sleeps with and uses men, the vulgarity of her language.  It is telling to me that these are the things that really disturb people.  I give props to this person who said the lesbian sex was repulsive to her and yet she gave the book 5 stars.  Kudos to her for sticking with something outside her comfort zone and still finding the beauty!

I, for one, loved to listen to her talk about sex, sexuality, and gender roles!

What shocks me is that no one seems to be talking about how she writes about race and racism in the book.  It seems to me that she is very much of the mindset that the South is the South and you just have to work with it.  You are a friend of black people if you work within the system to help 1 or 2 of them you know personally, but you would never try to dismantle that system, or actually get to know any of them in any real way.  She talks about racism from the edge of it, just taking a peek inside, and then running away from it full force.  It did not impact her life so much as it was happening around her.  It just totally took me out of the book.  

I know that literature can be mired in the timeframe it was written, but that does not make me love it anymore.  I just kept thinking about how it made me feel and then wondering how it might make others feel.  It just was not great.

The War of the Worlds

 The War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells
2002
Weight: 6 oz
Method of Disposal: Donating

If you plan to read the book and have not already, I give away the whole story below!

I read this because it was a classic.  I have read about it many times, but I have never read it.  It seemed like an easy fix to take this short novel to the bath and try to get away from work for a bit.  It was surprisingly good.  I guess what I mean is that, of course, it was well done and that is why we still read it all the years later, but it was also just good even though I had no interest in reading a book about aliens from Mars attacking England.  I enjoyed it and felt compelled to keep reading it despite that being the premise not in spite of it.

As in most English Classics, the women characters are never fleshed out humans and always leave much to be desired.  They had me for a moment with the ladies in the carriage, who the narrator travels with for a bit.  I could see them clearly when they were overcome by a gang of criminals, rescued by the narrator, and then returning the favor be wielding a pistol.  That decisive woman with a gun intrigued me, but that potential storyline never grew to be anything to write home about, and the narrator's wife is even less of a person and not featured often.

The description of the Martians tearing through the countryside, then into London, and battling ships at sea was something to imagine!  The English army failing to defend the country at every turn.  Not because they were not a strong human army, but because the Martians were such a formidable foe.  Then, the best part of all, the thing that finally killed the aliens was the bacteria that humans had been fighting off for ages.  Most excellent conclusion!

Nolo's Essential Guide to Buying Your First Home

 Nolo's Essential Guide to Buying Your First Home by Ilona Bray, J.D., Attorney Ann O'Connell, and Marcia Stewart
2019
Weight:1.5 lbs
Method of Disposal: Donating

We should be moving into our first home next month! This book made me feel a lot better about entering a world I felt ill prepared to tackle.  I was able to get used to the basic vocabulary of real estate, be exposed to different agreements I might enter into, and it gave me a checklist of things I needed to do and in what order I should do them.  Harry already knew much of what was in the book, being someone who has always loved the world of real estate.  She is constantly creeping around the house market, looking at all the homes going up for sale.

If you are looking to buy your first home but are feeling nervous, I would definitely recommend this book and also a great realtor who will be there for you as you make your way through the very expensive, exciting, and complicated world of home buying.

We cannot wait to get into our new home!

Untamed

 Untamed by Glennon Doyle
2020
Weight: 1.05 lbs
Method of Disposal: Giving to a Friend

I have wanted this book since before it was published, though I am quite new to Glennon Doyle, having just over a year ago discovered her at a Leadercast Conference.  It is hard to imagine us all packed into that auditorium now.  She had me laughing so much and, ever since, I have been on the hunt for this book, which finally was published.  Ultimately, a friend gave me a copy AND Harriet bought me a copy for Christmas.  I think Harry might have been trying to imply something when she bought be the LARGE PRINT edition.

I really enjoyed reading this book.  It does not include groundbreaking feminist ideology or tell us more about human sexuality than we previously knew, but it delivers information about both and so many other things in a fun, open, and useful way.  I loved (if love is the right word) when Doyle was talking about asking her kids if they were hungry.  The boys, in unison, immediately said "yes."  The girls looked to each other to determine silently if they themselves were hungry and one girl spoke up with "no."  I like how she describes the strengths of each of her kids and how different they are.  I appreciate her insights into addiction and living post-addiction.

There is a section of the book where a friend of hers says something about how she was "born that way," and she makes the argument of why could I not choose this for myself because it is GOOD.  Every time I hear "who would choose to be born that way," my soul cringes.  There was a time when I would not have chosen this, when I was young and scared, but now I would choose this and choose Harriet fully, knowingly, and 100 times over.

This is a good, fun, meaningful read.  I recommend it!

Twilight

Twilight (The Twilight Saga, Book 1) by Stephenie Meyer
2008
Weight: 1.1 lb
Method of Disposal: Donating 

I remember when Twilight came out and women in their twenties and thirties were flooding the bookstore I worked at to get their hands on a copy.  They freaking loved that shit.  One woman emphatically told me it was the BEST book she ever read.  Later,  I dated someone who loved to get high and giggle at the ridiculous movies and the acting.  The looks, the facial expressions--it was all a little too much for me.  I was determined to read Book One and to understand, but I just could not get there.  But, that makes me the odd one out.  This book was and is well loved.  I guess I grew up with and continued to pine away for Christopher Pike and Anne Rice.  

My copy of this book still has an EXCLUSIVE POSTER INSIDE, you lucky ducks!

El Camino A Cristo

 El Camino A Cristo by Elena G. De White
2002
Weight: 2.2 oz
Method of Disposal: Donating

I was alone, on a road trip, when I stopped at a rural, dark gas station.  A stack of these books were being given away outside the bathrooms.  I remember the feeling of freedom, the slight fear of being alone at night on the road, and the anticipation of seeing and experiencing new things.  I was younger, my eyesight was better, and I had little to no fear of death.  

I do not know what this book actually says anymore, but I remember how I was feeling when I picked it up.  I see that some other folks have given it really positive reviews on Amazon.  Maybe another grandmother somewhere will cherish this book as much as one other woman's did.  I am pretty sure it missed the mark with me, and I likely should never have taken it.  Maybe there was a reason though.  After all these years, it may make it to the right person.  Someone who is interested in finding their way to Christ.

I know I am, But What Are You?

 I know I am, But What Are You? by Samantha Bee
2010
Weight: 13.7 oz
Method of Disposal: Donating

I love Samantha Bee!  I was excited when she came out with a book, and I could enjoy her humor in another form.  I came to Bee when watching her short videos on The Daily Show.  I would get on the website just to watch her videos alone, and they were hysterical.  As is her book.  I love being caught laughing out loud while reading.  Pre-pandemic.  That never really happens to me now.

The Spirit to Serve: Marriot's Way

 The Spirit to Serve: Marriot's Way
1997
Weight: 9oz
Method of Disposal: Donating

Who better to learn customer service from than the service industry?!  This book is dated, but it still covers the basics of customer service and shines a light on what many people love about staying in certain hotels.  Mariott has been in the news lately for launching another Shanghai property (their 50th), the Marriott Bonvoy expanding their leisure destinations after the rough year the travel indusrty had in 2020, opening their 100th property in Tampa, etc.  So, as you can see, the company is still competing in 2021.

Zami: A New Spelling of My Name

 Zami: A New Spelling of My Name by Audre Lorde
1982
Weight: 14 oz
Method of Disposal: Donating

I am currently on a little bit of an Audre Lorde kick and have just re-read Zami: A New Spelling of my name.  One thing I absolutely love about Audre Lorde is that she is so seemingly honest and raw.  She is open about things that many people would keep private.  I think about her walking the streets with a knife in her coat, not knowing what she is doing or why, but disgruntled with upset about a recent breakup and her girlfriend finding a new partner.  This is not okay, and she knows this is not okay.  She does nothing with that knife, and she admits to having done it in her biography.  She writes about being a woman loving woman and a black woman in a time when that was even more shunned, ostracized, and legislated against than it is now.  She talks about trying to form a triatic relationship when no one around her was doing that and how it, ultimately, failed because no one in the relationship really knew themselves all that well.  We read about heterosexual feminists who cannot accept lesbianism or queerness of any sort.  They have no room in the movement.  Lorde writes about the anguish of losing her childhood bestfriend.  A friend that came to her for help and who she was unable to help at that time due to her fear of her parents anger.  She had no idea that meant her friend would end up dying by suicide, but it haunts her into adulthood.  She did not realize the abuse that friend was enduring at the hands of an adult man.  And yet, she also shows us beauty, determination, strength, and a will to fight and live.  

There is so much packed into this biography about race, class, coming of age, being a woman, loving women and people hating it, loving sex.  It ends with Lorde still in her twenties, and she still had so much life left to live.  She would pass away at 58, battling cancer, but she packed so much in to the next thirty or so years, and she left the world a more beautiful, empowered place.

I am now re-reading Sister Outsider.  I always appreciate the context Zami gives me for the rest of Lorde's work.

On Our Backs Guide to Lesbian Sex

 On Our Backs Guide to Lesbian Sex edited by Diana Cage
2004
Weight: 1.12 lbs
Method of Disposal: Who knows?  Seriously, who knows what I can do?

I never know how to rehome sex books.  All the guides, erotica, and photography.  There are so many great books I am sure someone out there would devour, but I never know how to get them from Point A to Point B.  I do not want to sell them, and I do not want them to get thrown out if I donate them.  Does anyone have any suggestions?  I have recently discovered that in the UK you can recycle your sex toys.  It is a money losing proposition and yet Lovehoney will do it.  Amazing.  

This particular sex guide is good in that it covers a lot of ground.  It takes you from cunnilingus, to fisting, to strap ons, to needles, to fire, to being fat and sexy, to being disabled and enjoying sex, to pornography, to tribadism.  All sorts.  You will get a good basic definition, some first hand accounts, some reminders about consent, and some photos.  For some people, the book seems to be too blunt and outspoken, but that is what Off Your Backs was for.  It pushed the borders of normal and celebrated the erotic without being curbed by the societal pressure to hold back.

That being said, if you are not a beginner and have not shied away from the risqué, there is not much here to learn at this point.  Or maybe, I have just oversaturated myself with sex, bdsm, kink information over the years.  This book is now over a decade old, and it shows in some areas.  The parts about online dating and the pornography recommendations are just two areas I can think of.  I also think, if done now, there would be even more about consent, safe words, gender fluidity, more sexualities represented...just more.

I will always appreciate Off Our Backs and this book still has an audience.  Hopefully, this book will find a new home and not end up in the landfill.  Someone that can handle profanity and diverse sexual desires.  Rest assured, it is your grandparent's, and possibly your parent's, worst nightmare.